Vanishing Twin Syndrome

It's both sad and good news when we heard that baby number 2 stopped growing and no fetal heartbeat at all. Good news because from 100 Carlisle's heartbeat is now 136 and continues to grow in size. I would love to have twins but God will always know what is best. Doctor's advice is always even if with just one baby, it is better to have one so complications will lessen. And I would be thankful enough because if there was  an abnormality with the second baby, it would be more difficult to raise each one equally. So we love you Carlisle no matter what. We would continue to pray to Lolo Uweng for a safe pregnancy.  LAST SUNDAY: Can I Just Complain? Carlisle, Gianna or Isaac Mommy is having a very difficult day today and I wanna cry but somehow I couldnt afford to become emotional today because i feel really sick and I dont like it babies. I know im doing a good job by just lying in bed most of the time but i dont like lying down because its so hard for me to get up! I threw up 4x today can you be kinder tom? 

Friday Mass at Landayan

I have been going to Sto Sepulchro Church is Landayan, San Pedro laguna for the past 4 fridays. I had to beg Mike to take me since Dra. Morin ordered me on strict bed rest. I compromised that I will just sit while at mass and i did by the way but eventually I asked Mike to just finish the gospel and take me home because im having backpains with the seat. I feel that I don't fit anymore. Anyway, I humbly asked lolo uweng to take away all the pain, subchronic hemorrhage and bless my twins with a good heartbeat or good yolk sac for my next ultrasound. He still gives me peace and hope. I will forever be grateful for Lolo Uweng for showering me with blessings most importantly blessing me with my twins. Carlisle, you are now 5 weeks. Last Thursday during the ultrasound it states you are less than 5 weeks age of gestation. You are not alone, you have a brother or a sister to share with your journey. Please share everything from food, nutrients, oxygen, blood etc. Mommy is always nauseous everytime i try to sit after kying down, when i stand up because of acidity. But i had to sacrifice lying in bed for the next 2 months ahead for you. We love you! If I can make an extra wish it will be a baby girl and a baby boy:)

You Gave Me A Scare

Many woman have pregnancy scare but what I experienced this afternoon was a miscarriage scare once again. Even if you have prepared yourself, your soul and your every being with the possibility of spotting or any pain related to pregnancy issues, you still cannot prepare yourself once fear of losing the baby kicks in. It may feel like remission.  Today is our 6th wedding anniversary and i had spotting. I was scared but not too scared. 

kinakabahan

after two days i have to test again one more sleep but hindi ako mkatulog since i was asleep the whole afternoon. kinakabahan ako na hindi ko maintindihan kasi i have been having back pain which is not a good sign for pregnancy pero siguro kaya sumasakit is because matagal tagal din ako nakahiga today. i just want to blog bout this feeling. I am also on crinone gel today. i hve to hold my wiwi for atleast until 3 am para d naman sayang yung gamot and for the hcg to go up. I am excited tom baby. whatever happens i will still o to mass. my third mass for my nine mass novena sana baby mabuo ko. love you!

Another Pregnancy Test

Oh noh:) Mama thought you are there already with the positive pregnancy test but we have to repeat the pregnancy test by tom, June 15 feast of sacred heart. I am still hopefulmyou are there already baby. Sorry its mama's fault i got excited to test baba. I will go the Lolo Uweng again tom for another prayer. Hope you are still positive tom Carlisle.

Hello Carlisle!

Good job Carlisle! I am not supposed to do a pregnancy test until June 18 according to Dra. Morin and according to my calculations, tom June 14 atleast. But i had a hunch you might show a slight positive or a faint line today. I decided let's go for it. It's Sasha's 7th bday today. I think Sasha talked with Carlisle to show up as her gift for mommy and daddy. In 8 days, it will be our 6th wedding anniversary!What a special surprise!

two week wait

i have been fighting madness within this period or what you call a two week wait. Today is monday and i will test friday, June 15 feast of sacred heart. I have some possible pregnancy symptoms like breast tenderness just today, i have been having vivid dreams for the past 2 nights, craving for pizza, my temp is always up. Ihave read somewhere you can have stuffy nose when pregnant which i have been feeling the past few days. It takes some patience for me not to purchase and use the pregnancy test kit. So Friday it is. I actually have one place now i find it peaceful and full of hope. It's near our home probably just 15 minutes without traffic. The church is called Santo Sepulcro. Or Church of the Holy Sepulcher. Prior to my last ob gyne visit, I attended mass on that day to visit the place and heard mass. People say one must hear mass for 9 executive Fridays. I am done with two masses, so seven more to go. Prayers will keep me sane and i hope Papap Jesus will hear my prayers soon.